“Mommy, don’t kill me.”
Since I usually like to know as little as possible about a movie I’ve never seen before, I was a little thrown off by the documentary style commentary on abortion at opening. At first I thought I clicked on the wrong film.
20 years later: Dee Wallace is a horror legend and has portrayed a mother for most of her career. At age 69, this film is no exception. Her kids, Jerry, Ginny, Suzy, and the adopted Hope, visit her and Uncle Joe for Christmas.
Uncle Joe Catches Suzy’s boyfriend, Peter, spying on Ginny and her husband, Scott, having sex in the laundry room. Maybe he was looking for pointers because he and Suzy have been trying to get pregnant for the past six years. Dee gives Suzy money for fertility treatment, but she and Peter are convinced that God is all they need. Peter is a man of the cloth. At what point do you listen to God and quit trying? Getting pregnant is not that hard, there are a lot of unwanted children in the world, so if you can’t make it happen, when do you tap out and admit that God doesn't want you to have a baby? God initially spoke to you six years ago and you’re still arguing? I believe in God's will, except when it opposes my desires.
Elsewhere, some dude gets his dick ripped off by a cloaked figure delivering presents, then gets his head split open by his own knife sharpener.
Back at the house, Ginny is mad that her parents are selling the house and putting Jerry in an assisted living facility. Jerry has Down-Syndrome, which I am only mentioning because it becomes essential to the plot later. Dee’s doorbell rings. It’s the creepy cloaked figure. She lets him inside the house. His name is Cletus. He has a card for “Mother.” Inside the card is a letter about an abortion clinic that blew up 20 years ago. Dee freaks out. She has a secret and her husband died 20 years ago.
Hope, Scott, and Dee go outside to watch the sunset. Hope wanders off and finds the jar of peanuts Dee gave to Cletus. Hope is allergic to peanuts. Dee and Scott go back inside because the girls are fighting over pie. Hope gets axed in half from head to crotch. They soon discover Hope’s body, or bodies at this point.
Uncle Joe tries to call the police, but the power is out in the house. Not sure what Uncle Joe’s relationship is to Dee. It seems like there’s a little too much going on for them to be brother and sister, but nothing actually happens between them.
The family is now trapped in the house with a killer on the loose. Now would probably be a good time for Dee to fess up and explain what this is all about. Scott gets axed in the head. They hide in the garage and Uncle Joe goes back into the house to get the car keys. After he gets the keys he gets choked to death from behind as he tries to start the car and then the car hits Peter.
Ginny falls down and is now about to go into labor. Peter is still alive and can deliver it, but she doesn’t want him near her. Dee finally comes clean to Peter: She didn’t have a miscarriage 20 years ago, she had an abortion. Her husband was dying in chemo and she didn’t want to deal with another baby with Down-Syndrome. She swears him to secrecy even though she should be telling everybody the truth.
The Sheriff arrives and gets death by bear-trap on head.
Cletus wants to know if Dee loves him as Peter hides behind Jerry with a shotgun and shoots. He may or may not have hit Cletus. Dee searches the cop car and Cletus is back. “Mommy.” She pulls a gun on him and starts shooting. Cletus grabs Peter and drags him through the house as Peter tries to grab weapons along the way until they pray together. For a guy battling Down-Syndrome and surviving abortion, he sure has a strong will-not to mention freakish strength. Peter stabs him, but then gets a blender blade to the back of the head.
Now Jerry is pissed. He thinks Dee wanted to abort him too and doesn’t love him because he has Down-Syndrome. It's a tough argument because even though she can reassure Jerry that if she could do it over she would do it the same, the evidence of her failed abortion proves she wouldn't. Granted, when she was pregnant with Jerry his father was healthy, and it would have been more of a hardship as as a single parent. Jerry and Cletus share a moment.
Cletus hides behind the couch wearing Jerry’s hat. Seeing Jerry's hat, Dee walks into the hallway and shoots Jerry thinking he is Cletus. She goes back to finish off Cletus, but is out of bullets then she sees his face for the first time. He kinda looks like Sloth from Goonies, only more fucked up. She calls him a son of a bitch, which I thought was funny since she’s his mom, then tackles him. He gets his ax and Dee runs outside.
Upstairs Ginny has her baby. Dee hears the cries so she lures Cletus to her. Suzy hears her so she runs outside and gets killed. Dee goes back inside. Ginny is hiding in a stuffed bear(?) and Cletus stabs her. Dee runs in and stabs him in the mid-section with some sort of sickle on a chain that's wrapped around her neck and she jumps out the window. She snaps her neck, but it also pulls Cletus out after her by his wound and now he is evidently dead too.
The baby is left on the bed alone. He’s fucked. Maybe he’ll come back in 20 years for a sequel?
The Gilligan/Badass Bitch Award goes to Dee Wallace for creating the situation in the first place, then stopping at nothing to end it.
What did we learn? Survival Tips:
1) Don’t urinate on mysterious cloaked figures.
2) Don’t invite mysterious cloaked figures into your house.
3) Always check the backseat before just starting up the car when you know there’s a psycho on the prowl.